I hate talking about myself. I hate it. A lot. I hate self-promotion, I hate telling you how great I am and all of the cool things I've done. It's something that I've always struggled with personally. I even have a hard time writing a bio for my website or submitting one to event organizers who invite me to give a talk.
The Notion of “Personal Branding” Started Getting Under My Skin Years Ago
My dislike of self-promotion reached a climax in 2006. That’s when TIME magazine announced that “YOU” were the Person of the Year. I had been blogging about the intersection of PR and the digital age for about a year at that time, and always kept what I shared professional. It was never about me and only about my clients and the communications industry. That’s why I wasn’t thrilled about the cover story. It really got under my skin.
Personal Branding Started Taking Off
Not long after that, personal branding became the topic de jour. I was intensely uncomfortable with it because PR professionals are taught to create stories, not be the story. Being the story means you’ve failed.
I hated the whole idea of having to brand myself. I thought that was the stupidest idea ever and vented my frustration by writing blog posts with titles like “News Flash: You Don't Own Your Personal Brand or Reputation,” “The Cult of Social Media Personality: Whatever Happened to Communication?” and “Beyond Personal Brand to Character.” Not very subtle.
With all the talk of personal branding going on around me and more of my entrepreneur and consulting friends embracing it, I wondered whether I should start dipping my toe into it as well or continue to reject it outright.
I decided to give it a shot.
I’m Not the Only One Who Has Ever Struggled with Personal Branding
As it turns out, other people also have concerns about personal branding. Their imposter syndrome may even flare up, that annoying little voice that says, “What makes you think you are special? What makes what you do any different than what everyone else out there is doing?”
Several of the students in my Smart Social Mastery membership class even ask me, “Will I come across as boastful or arrogant?” And what I usually tell them is that precisely because they’re concerned about not coming across negatively, the chances are pretty small that they will.
Other concerns are around cultural norms against self-promotion and fear of judgment from others.
Flip the Script
What helped me finally be able to create a personal brand was to realize that branding myself wasn't really about me. It was more about presenting what I and my work stood for in the strongest way possible so I could best serve my audience and clients.
Think of it this way: If your stories are in service to how they will help someone else, then it's not bragging. It’s simply showcasing your strengths and what makes you an asset to those you serve.
Even national and international brands do this. Think of Dove’s massively successful “Real Beauty” campaign, which has been going strong for about two decades. Dove just released a new campaign, The Code, which “looks at the impact of AI on beauty, while celebrating the lasting legacy Dove has built.” It even released a free downloadable Real Beauty Prompt Playbook (scroll down the page).
You are Unique
What you need to remember is you have insights no one else has. I can't tell you how many times I’ve been thanked for sharing an insight or a struggle I overcame. As Brené Brown says in her book Daring Greatly, “Truth and courage aren't always comfortable, but they're never weakness. Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity.”
Embrace Authenticity and Vulnerability
I don't have to tell you how much trust has plummeted in this era of deep fakes and fake news. One of the only ways to stand out – in a good way – is to be real, be authentic.
The Harvard Business School study Fostering Perceptions of Authenticity via Sensitive Self-Disclosure revealed that when leaders disclosed their weaknesses, far from being judged or losing status, it led to positive outcomes. People wanted to work with those individuals more because they were perceived as being authentic.
Discussing your own challenges and admitting weaknesses can significantly enhance your reputation with others. Audiences often view such disclosures as honest and courageous, rather than seeing them as signs of incompetence. It also makes you more relatable. To quote Brené Brown again, “Vulnerability is not weakness, it is our greatest measure of courage.” Key is making these disclosures voluntarily, not out of obligation.
Highlight Positive Outcomes
When talking about or sharing sensitive topics, the one thing you want to remember to do is to share how you've managed these challenges or what you've learned from them. This not only enhances your authenticity, but also provides valuable insights and inspiration to your audience. They’ll see you as someone who has faced something hard and come out the other end. And that’s a personal brand to be proud of.
Bonus
There’s an ironic additional benefit to focusing on others rather than yourself – you’re more likely be regarded as a thought-leader. As I wrote recently in Forbes, “Thought leadership is nonpromotional by nature. When you use it to promote something, it instantly has an ulterior motive and is less trustworthy….It is 100% about the person who hears it; in return, they look to you for more insight, and you become the ‘go-to' thought leader.”
I share more about all of this in my livestream, which you can watch in replay.
